My journey to gain physical, mental, and emotional health.

If you’re looking for some inspirational music, this is a good song to listen to.

NYAF is now on facebook!

Yes, it’s true. I’ve started a page for Not Your Average Fitness on facebook. It’s purpose is to post motivational/inspirational content and allow a lot more interaction. I’m happy to take questions, post suggestions for healthy eating, living. etc. I’m really hoping that you’ll stop by and ‘like’ my page. You can find it at

https://www.facebook.com/NYAfitness

 

Thanks for sticking with me!

Monday morning, you wake up 10 minutes late and have to rush to get ready for work, You miss your morning shower and go to work feeling less than your best, as you’re trying to get your coffee, the line is crazy long and you’re nervously watching the minutes tick by hoping that your boss comes in later than you. Unfortunately he’s the first one to greet you as you walk in the door with a less-than-friendly reminder of all those deadlines you have coming up in the next few hours. The whole day you’re rushing, no time to eat lunch, and (barely) make your deadlines. As you go home you’re tired but your mind is racing with everything that happened today and even as you’re trying to fall asleep, your mind just won’t quit.

 

How many of us have experienced something similar to this? You have one of those days full of rushing and rushing and rushing, even when you come home it feels like the day is one whole bag of ‘hurry up’. That’s pretty much my opinion about American society. At work, we often have to do things quicker lest they replace us with someone who will work for cheaper and get the job done in 1/2 the time. It can start with something as small as waking up just a few minutes late and then you know your whole day is going to be a mess. It doesn’t just apply to stressful situations though, how many times have we looked forward to some special event that will happen ‘someday’ and just let the days whiz by us thinking about what could/would/will be? Why is it so difficult to enjoy the present without worrying about the past or future?

I was thinking about this as I took an impromptu walk today – a two hour impromptu walk. I couldn’t stand to be in my house anymore because I kept thinking and thinking and I couldn’t organize my thoughts because I felt so stir crazy! Everything was racing around and I just couldn’t get it all to calm down, so I got out of the house and I walked and walked and walked. I noticed a lot of amazing things on my walk, but by far the most outstanding was the perspective I gained on this walk. I’m not talking about some overarching perspective on the meaning of life, but physical perspective of my environment. I walked a road that I have driven for years, pretty much on a daily basis. As I was walking, the road looked different: the trees lining the streets seemed taller and more beautiful, the sun seemed to hit everything just right, and the beauty of my surroundings really flourished in a way I had never seen before. How is it that I could see this road which I have driven hundreds of times in a way I had never seen it before?

It’s because I slowed down

I truly believe that walking this path forced me to slow down and truly see what I was experiencing. As I’m driving, I am going fast and I’m driving with a purpose. Today my purpose was simple: walk until I couldn’t walk any more. The funny thing is, I thought that sitting around would be a slow activity and allow me to organize my thoughts, but when I’m still everything seems to build up and go into hyperdrive. When I move at a slow pace, my mind follows. I walked for two hours and was able to truly compartmentalize all my thoughts and feelings that have been plaguing me lately. I’m talking thoughts that have been keeping me up at night and I was able to sort them out and come to terms with everything. 

I want everyone to experience this and I truly hope you all do. Walking may not be your thing, maybe bike rides are better or going for a relaxing swim or something. Whatever you do, put aside your extreme, fast-paced work/fitness/home life aside for just a little while and SLOW DOWN. Physically, slow down but don’t stop moving all together. Get out of your house and just go, go until you don’t feel your legs/arms/body anymore. Just go. Now, in an hour, whenever you have the time. It’s important to let yourself go slowly and leave behind our mentality of “hurry up or you’re (job, relationship, money) is on the line!!” I give you all permission to slow down just for a little while, then you’re allowed to build back up to your fast-paced life. Slowing down once a week may save your sanity, so please give it a try.

Have you tried to slow down? What activities work best for you to slow your body and mind? What has your experience been like taking some time away from the fast life?

Something that really bothers me is people’s negativity and lack of celebration. I say it bothers me because everyone deserves to celebrate themselves and their hard work. It’s way too easy to say “I didn’t lose as much weight as I wanted to this week” or “I still haven’t achieved my goals”. When we put these negative thoughts in our heads, they seriously eat away at our motivation. It starts out as not meeting goals, then it becomes a question of “Can I ever meet my goals?” and turns into “I’ll never make it so why bother?” Raise your hand if you’ve ever experienced this

*Raises hand*

We all set long-term goals for ourselves like losing 50 lbs, 100 lbs, gaining 10 lbs of muscle, eating better, the list goes on and on. These are fantastic aspirations to have, just like being a CEO someday, however these goals take months, even years to achieve sometimes. Why are we limiting ourselves to only one occasion to celebrate success? Why aren’t we celebrating ourselves every single week?

As I said before, motivation is very easily lost. It is a constant struggle to keep convincing ourselves that this workout will make the difference and this meal will keep us healthy. What motivates us most easily is success and the sense of achievement. So today I challenge everyone to give yourself a reason to celebrate. Workout for an extra 5 minutes and tell yourself “I could have stopped at 30 minutes, but I pushed myself hard for an extra 5 I wasn’t even planning on doing.” Go for a 10-20 minute walk. It’s so quick and can benefit you much more than sitting on the couch will. If you’ve completed all your planned workouts for this week, give yourself a HUGE high-five. I’m sending you a hypothetical high-five through the internet right now! Just because you aren’t somewhere yet, doesn’t mean you’ve failed and shouldn’t acknowledge your work up to this point. To get the ball rolling, I’ll start by sounding off on my accomplishments this summer:

– I took on a 30 day squat challenge I never though I would finish, and now I’m 4 days away from finishing

– I climbed to one of the highest peaks in my state without a second thought. I could never have imagined I’d be standing on top of a mountain looking out over the valleys, but I did.

– I recently bought and started T25. I thought I’d follow the program for maybe two weeks and then start giving up on it. I’m now at the end of week 3 and have NO intentions of stopping.

So remember that it’s the small things in life, like continuing on when you thought you’d give in, pushing hard for those extra 5 minutes you didn’t have to do, drinking that bottle of water instead of that soda, and of course losing those inches and pounds. Celebrate yourself, and I promise you will stay motivated. Keep looking forward everyone and I know you will get to where you want to go.

How to ensure success

When undertaking any new type of regimen for nutrition or exercise, there are many factors that can pose as challenges to success. Often times I have seen, and experienced, that even when people seem to really want to make a change, there are things that just keep getting in their way. As I’ve said before, a huge part of success is motivation. The more you want something, the more you are ‘hungry’ for it, the greater the chances that you will achieve it. However, change is complicated because we are doing something very different, we are essentially having to re-learn and adapt to some new concept. Humans are habitual creatures, we make patterns out of behaviors because it helps us function more efficiently. When you start a new exercise program for example, this is something your body and mind aren’t used to, so naturally there are going to be ‘growing pains’ as your body adapts and realizes the new pattern you are creating for it. So while motivation is a crucial factor for success, we may be inhibited by our natural tendencies. How the hell are we going to be as successful as we want to be when our body is telling us to do what we’ve always done? It feels like the odds are stacked against us.

Personally, I have had so many struggles with success and I still feel like I haven’t seen true ‘success’ to this day. I have seen steps towards success, but I still don’t feel that I’ve really reached any of my goals. I tend to do a lot of ‘falling off the horse’. My typical motivational ‘cycle’ (if you will) looks like this: one day decide that I am ready to make a change and I want to be incredibly fit and active, eat right, and look great. I’ll then make those changes and feel great for a few days, and something happens and I have a slip up where I eat something really bad or skip a workout. At this point, it is a HUGE spiral downward. If I eat something bad, I’ll eat a LOT of bad things and then I’m on a week-long binge of junk food before I restart my motivational cycle. If I skip a workout, then I skip the next day, and the next, and eventually I just stop working out until the motivation lights up in me again. I’m sure there are other people out there who have experienced a similar situation to this (if not, congrats!!). So what is the key to being successful and avoiding this deviation from our goals?

The first thing I’ll say is that it’s not always a bad thing to slip up. It may sound crazy, but slipping up has actually taught me so much. Each time I mess up and eat something bad or skip a workout, I learn something from that. Some of the things I have learned are:

  • Almond butter is a trigger for me and causes me to crave more sweets
  • I can skip one day of working out and be okay, but if I skip a second day then I will likely stop working out for a while
  • Dark chocolate is not a trigger and helps kill my sweet tooth craving
  • Flavored carbonated water also helps kill my sweet cravings

What I’ve come to realize about all these times I messed up is that they actually hold some value and help me to know what to do for the future. Take the almond butter for example – one day I saw a packet of almond butter and I thought it would make a great snack. I had it, and then later I ran into MASSIVE cravings for chocolate and sweets. It was at that point that I realized that almond butter was a no-go, at least until I learned how to get past cravings. It is completely normal to deviate from your plans, everyone has those little mess ups and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. If you go off your diet/exercise routine/whatever then make sure you take something from that. Learn about yourself – what caused you to indulge? Was it some event that stressed you out? Were you overly excited and wanted to celebrate? Were you bored?

Part of ensuring success is learning why we ‘fail’ (by the way, I hate that word so please excuse me for using it. Failure I think is too negative, I like to consider slip-ups a learning experience). Think of this as something similar to ‘there wouldn’t be sunshine without rain’. We need to have comparisons in order to really have ‘success’ because in its very nature, success is a change or a difference in something.

Another part of ensuring success is taking what you’ve learned about yourself and planning for the future! You may have heard this a thousand times, but it is the best way to make sure that you will continue to succeed. ‘Winging it’ is very risky and may work for some, but it is not reliable at all. This is especially true for going on trips.
HAVE.A.PLAN

Plan times that you would be able to squeeze in a quick workout (or a longer one if possible). Alternatively, plan for some fun activities that you can get everyone involved in that require some movement (going on a hike, a long walk, sight-seeing on bikes, etc). Bring some light weights with you or think of household items that you can lift while you are there. Find some really quick and easy exercises that you can do anywhere, anytime.

For food – always bring snacks. I cannot stress this enough. I know that when I travel, eating schedules get so thrown off and I’m not sure when we’re going to stop, where we might eat, and if that place will have things that I’m able to eat. For those without allergies, this may be simpler because you don’t necessarily have to avoid foods, but those with allergies I’m sure are aware that you should always be prepared. I tend to bring larabars and pistachios with me at all times so that I know I will have an emergency reserve of food if I need it.

     Also, do some research into the restaurants that surround the area that you’ll be staying in. Look for which places have gluten-free menus (if necessary, call the restaurant and ask), and try to look at their menus online ahead of time so you can figure out what they have that you’re able to eat. It’s much less stressful to figure these things out ahead of time so that you know what modifications to ask for if needed.

     Finally (and this goes along with snacks), always have a back-up plan. Life is super unpredictable and having a backup plan helps with that. For example, you might want to go to a restaurant and come to realize that it’s closed for whatever reason. Know what else is around and again, always have snacks just in case you really need to eat soon.

The more effort you put into planning your workouts and meals while you’re away, the greater chance you have at staying successful and on-track for your goals. It’s difficult enough trying to stay on-track on any given day, but throwing travelling into the mix adds a whole other level of difficulty. So my advice to you is to over-plan. At worst – you don’t need to use most of your plan and you’re able to stay on track; at best – you use your plan and (hopefully) stay on track.

Next time I will continue this post and focus more on what we can learn from our slip ups and how to apply that to the future.

Have you ever used a plan when travelling? Did it work? What are some steps that you take to make sure you are successful every day?

This morning I wanted to blog about the differences between being ‘skinny’ and being ‘fit’, but after a bit of thought I have decided to go 180 with my topic and talk more about reasons for working out and who we are doing it for.

What difference does it make who I’m doing this for?

It makes a world of difference in my eyes. There’s no shame in wanting to get in shape for your partner (or to attract a partner), but it’s important to do some soul searching to determine what you’re really working towards and who you’re really working for. External motivation can be so helpful for us to jump start a new workout routine or a healthy lifestyle and that’s fantastic, but external motivation like that does not necessarily keep us going. I feel that when our fitness goals are aimed at pleasing someone else, we really give the benefits and good-feelings to that person which leaves us exhausted both physically and mentally. When I focus on working out to look good for my partner it gives me motivation, but at the end of each workout I keep questioning whether or not I went hard enough and wondering if I’ll look good enough for him. Eventually it leads me into an unhealthy vicious circle of feeling the need to workout even more, eat healthier, eat less, and then I get to a place where I feel like I’ll just never ‘win’ which leads to a binge of unhealthy foods. This may not be the case for everyone, but it certainly is for me.

Something I have come to realize though, is that I am not really working out for my partner. I really am working out for me. My partner just gets to enjoy the overflow of benefits that I am seeing. I know that I will come to a healthy and good-looking body at my own pace and that’s perfectly okay. I might not have my ideal body in 6 months, a year, or 10 years, but I have faith that I am working to get there some day. Every day that I exercise is another step closer to my hopes and goals, but I am the one who should get to celebrate that success. I should not give that right to others, especially when there’s no guarantee that they will celebrate it the way I would want them to. It is time for me to own my successes and my progress.

Are you suggesting that we shouldn’t use others for motivation?

Not at all. I am a huge proponent of ‘do what works for you’. I chose to share this experience today because I feel that when you let someone else own your success, you can very easily let them own your happiness. My experience with this was that I would feel like I looked good, and then I would think ‘wow my partner is going to tell me how great I look’ and I wouldn’t hear anything from them. This, in turn, would make me feel like I wasn’t doing enough working out because clearly they would have commented on it if I had done well. In essence, if my partner wasn’t noticing my progress, I wasn’t truly happy. Thankfully I have since begun to own my success and celebrate myself when notice results. If my partner notices results, well then I get to celebrate twice!

The point I’m trying to make in this post is that it is so important to allow yourself to celebrate small successes on your own terms. If we don’t let ourselves celebrate, then what is our motivation to keep going? Make sure to set SMART goals – specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely. A good goal is something like “I want to go for a twenty minute run three times this week”. If your goal is focused around working out, be specific about what kind of workouts you want to do, how many, what counts as a ‘workout’, and make sure it’s something you can do! It’s easy for people to stretch waaaaaay too far on their goals – don’t do that. It’s setting yourself up for failure. Set a goal that is just above what you typically do. If you go on walks for 3 days a week, you might make a goal to go on a walk four days this week for an extra 5 minutes than you normally do. By setting these ‘microgoals’, you allow yourself to build up to bigger goals and eventually get to a place you never even thought you would be.

What are your goals for this week? What is your true motivation for achieving these goals?

This woman is 89 years old and still works out regularly. She says that she doesn’t feel any difference in energy from her younger years. This is how I want to be when I’m her age!

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

This is a quote from the Martin Luther King Jr. memorial in Washington, DC. I’m starting with this quote because it’s applicable to every aspect of our lives. I see it as a symbol of maturity and growth. It may sound cheesy or cliché, but I don’t think we ever stop growing as people. There is no end line in terms of learning; we are never complete. How can we be when everything around us changes on a minute-to-minute basis? Part of being an ‘adult’ is accepting the fact that we can always grow and change, but we must be open to it. We must be ready and willing to adapt to new situations in order to better ourselves. I apply this to myself in terms of physical fitness.

I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how easy it is to wake up in the morning and say “I don’t want to work out today” or “wow the internet looks especially interesting today, I think I’ll skip my workout and just go online instead”. If you aren’t sure how easy it is do to this, it’s easy. Try it tomorrow, I’m sure you’ll understand. Here, we have our challenge: we know that it’s healthier to push through a workout instead of lazing around all day, but it’s so much easier to sit than it is to be jumping around and getting all sweaty! However the real challenge is not the workout itself, is it? Perhaps, and hopefully, workouts are challenging; however, the real challenge is much deeper than that.

When we constantly skip our workouts in lieu of resting, we are giving in to our inner spoiled child. Now don’t get me wrong, we all need rest days. The difference I am trying to highlight is that we can’t be telling ourselves every day that we ‘deserve’ a rest day. This is a pitfall that I experience constantly. I will go about my day with every intention of working out, and then I find myself saying “you know what, I think I’m good for today, I’ll just skip it” and I will! I’ll go back online and talk to people or find the end of the internet instead of taking a simple 25 minutes to work out. To me, this says that I am lacking maturity. I have given in to that inner child who is screaming at the grocery store for their favorite food until mommy finally gives in and buys it. I want to be very clear here as this could easily get misconstrued, I am not saying that I am immature or that anyone who does this is immature. I am saying that this is a moment where maturity and willpower is lacking. By no means does this make anyone a bad or weak person. One moment does not define who we are, it’s when we are always having these moments that it becomes time to take a look at ourselves and say “what’s really going on here?”

The quote from the memorial says that we are measured by our actions in challenging and controversial times. So what really is the challenge in this case? The challenge is overcoming ourselves. I know that I have the ability to be incredibly fit and healthier than a horse, so why aren’t I? Because I am turning myself away from that opportunity. I know that when I push through a workout even on a day when I’m feeling lazy, I will feel better about myself because I will have shown maturity. I will have acted strong in a time of challenge as opposed to taking the easy way out, and this is a distinguishing factor (for me at least). I want to know that when the going gets tough, I won’t be the first one out the door. I need to be able to see things through even when it’s the last thing I want to do. For me, this is not a test of strength or ability, because I know I have the potential to get where I want to be. This is a test of maturity and willpower; it’s a test to see how badly I really want these results. Once I can truly get past my mind telling me to take the easy way out, then I will know that I have achieved maturity.

Look out for another video update on Hip Hop Abs coming soon!

I think it is crucial to address the importance of rest days and exactly what they entail. First though, I want to do a recap of my first week on hip hop abs.

So I did not follow the schedule that came with hip hop abs, I just did my own thing. I found it to be successful and it really does seem to be helping my abs. I will say that I haven’t experienced that next-day sore and there are some days where I wonder if I’m doing it right. I think that with time I’ll get more used to the moves that they use and hopefully I’ll continue to see progress. My plan is to follow the 30-day calendar that they provide and see how that works for me. There are additional workouts that I might try on top of the workout for the day, but I really need to stick to this schedule. Also, I know that I really need to put some focus into my diet. I’m pretty lassiez-faire about my diet and I will let myself cheat here and there, but I want to take more time to truly focus on what I’m putting into my body and how it will help (or hurt) me.

Now, on to rest days. I’m sure that everyone has heard over and over again ‘take a day to rest, let your muscles heal’. It’s true, your body is going to have an incredibly hard time growing if you don’t take the time to let it relax a bit. However, I know that for me personally, I don’t like sitting around all day doing nothing. So how do you take a rest day when all you want to do is go hard and work out? I myself enjoy taking my dogs for long walks. It’s a very easy-going activity that still gets me close to that workout feeling, but doesn’t push my body hard. I don’t believe that the term ‘rest day’ needs to be synonymous with ‘lazy day’. It can be, you are more than welcome to take a day to do nothing if you so choose, especially if you are pushing yourself to your limits for more than 4 days a week; but for those of us who need to engage in some kind of activity, don’t feel like you aren’t allowed to do anything. It could be as simple as going really easy on your workouts, use really really light weights and do minimal sets, go for a long walk or a short brisk jog, go for an easy swim, or if you’re choosing to have a lazy day you can just get up every 30 minutes and mill around a bit. Rest days don’t have to be unproductive. The important thing is that you take at minimum one day a week to go easy.

Rest days can be a great time to focus on going hard in other areas of your life, such as mental health or nutrition. I’m sure it goes without saying that nutrition plays a huge role in your health and fitness. Mental health is also very important, it’s what keeps you sane and motivated! So please make sure you are taking time to recuperate. If you find yourself with a lot of pent-up energy on a rest day, find another good outlet to focus it on.

What is your typical routine on a rest day? 

It’s a pretty simple question right? Are your workouts long enough? Here’s the good news, I have the answer for you.

Yes*

*the real question is how hard are you going?


I do not put stock in the idea that longer workouts are automatically better or more effective. I think that’s total crap. Scenario: There are two people at a gym. Person A walks at an average pace on the treadmill for 30 minutes (which is clearly not exhausting for this person) and then does a machine circuit without any added weight for 30 minutes (again, clearly not exhausting for this person). Person B does 5 all-out sprints on the treadmill which takes 10 minutes, and then does some quick leg work with weights that are pretty heavy for 10 minutes.

So did Person A have the better workout because they were at the gym for an hour? No! This isn’t to say that Person A’s workout was bad – referring back to the top of my post, I believe that any kind of activity that gets you moving in some way is a good workout; however, that doesn’t mean that short workouts aren’t good enough. If you give your all for 20 minutes, that might be all you need for the day!

There are plenty of days where I just do not want to work out because in my mind, I don’t know that I can push myself for a whole hour to get a ‘complete’ workout in. I stop myself and say “if I can give it my all for 20 minutes, that’s a hell of a lot better than not doing anything.” So today, my advice to you is that even when you just don’t feel like working out (exception: if you are sick or injured) then just give everything you can for 20 minutes, 10 minutes, hell even 5 minutes. Do whatever you can possible muster, because I promise you that those little workouts start adding up and making a difference. Granted, it won’t make an immediate difference, but it will do more for your body then sitting on the couch watching TV will.

My challenge to you is to be active every single day for the next 7 days. Whether it’s a serious workout or taking a 5-10 minute walk that you normally wouldn’t have taken. Even when you’re tired and the last thing you want to do is exercise, do what you can.